Dr Jayanie Kodituwakku
The lack of confidence relates to a lack of self-esteem and the perception of how others see us. I find it is an increasing issue I hear from Business Leaders across all levels in an organisation. Who doesn’t feel a lack of confidence at one point in our life? And for some there is a more consistent version of this.
When we feel a lack, we don’t think so well about ourselves. This can produce an adverse impact on your performance including:
- Not producing the results that are expected from you and your team not matter the circumstance
- Stepping back from giving your valid expertise and experience
- Unfocussed decision making
- Poor Leadership
- Playing small across the board!
THE BIG MYTH
The old way of thinking about self-esteem and confidence is that you either have it or you don’t.
Most of us are bought up to think that if you don’t have confidence we have to work hard to develop it. However, everyone has these feelings of a lack of confidence, they come and go. But we can begin to falsely believe that if we have these feelings a lot, it is a characteristic that will always stick. We may label ourselves ‘I am not a confident person’ or ‘I have no confidence’.
We are born with confidence. It is the nature of who we are. If you observe children, they have an abundance of confidence. The other day I heard my nephew, who is 6 years old declare ‘I am a genius’ with such belief in himself, he just knew it. He had learnt how to count up in a sequence of 5’s to 100.
‘What if everything you’ve ever thought about where confidence comes from is simply not true?’
When we fall deeply into the present there is no feeling of a ‘lack of confidence’ or insecurity.
Confidence does not come from our upbringing, genetics, our environment, the people we socialise with or anything outside of us. But we may buy into the myth that surrounds confidence because no one tells us anything different.
Dr Jayanie Kodituwakku is a former PricewaterhouseCoopers Management Consultant, Coach and Innovator. She works with individuals, teams and organisations to reveal the unexpected keys to Insight; the ultimate leverage point for creating a thriving business and life. To learn more about Jayanie’s ‘Leadership Immersion Experience’ please click here.